Small Talk


August 24th, 2011

Ever have one of those days where nothing goes right? I had a day yesterday where it seemed like everything I did embarrassed me. It's not that it went wrong; it just took a detour through shame first.

I had a business meeting mid-day and met someone at his office. After the meeting I went into the public restroom. I hung my purse on the door and put my papers and cell phone on the floor. (I know it's gross but there was nowhere else.)

After I left the bathroom, I got into my car and drove back to work. When I got out of the car, I did not see my purse in the trunk or in the front seat. I freaked out. I riffled through the trunk (which has a lot of stuff in it) and didn't see it.

I panicked and figured I left it on the bathroom door. I sped back to the bathroom to hopefully retrieve it. I also called my contact and asked him to please check the womens' public bathroom. Luckily, we have a friendly history that goes back a couple years, so it wasn't nearly as embarrassing as a first impression.

There was a lot of traffic in Waikiki so it felt like I was crawling. It's like the dream sequence where you think you're running but you go nowhere.

When I got back to his office, I sprinted into the bathroom and didn't find it. I freaked out some more and then decided to recheck everything. Wouldn't you know it; it was buried in my trunk.

I was too wired on adrenaline to register shame at this point, and I gave myself an upset stomach. I am upset now as I re-live it.

In the late afternoon, I had some friends come to try afternoon tea at the hotel. I never make reservations. It's always wide open.

Except, duh, I'm promoting the afternoon tea right now. So due in part to my own p.r. efforts, the tea is mostly sold out for August.

My friends show up and I can't get us in for tea. We went to another restaurant on property, so all's well that ends well, but kind of dopey on my part.

Lastly, I get home, and I am so glad to be wrapping up the day. After I shower, my kid comes over and hands me a pair of my underwear.

She normally doesn't select my underwear for me, so I asked, "What's this for?"

"It was in my nap-time sheet at school," she answered. I had washed the sheet and sent it back with a hot pink panty embedded inside.

This is why, to paraphrase that popular saying, you have to do more than wear clean underwear. You have to own nice looking ones, in case you end up accidentally sending it to preschool for 15 kids and three teachers to see.

What's your embarrassing story?


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11 Responses to “Embarrassing”

  1. Rosette:

    yes that happened to me my underwear stuck to my husband legs ..he looked down then oh my underwear stuck ...I didn't use fabric softener... one of those old underwear with elastic almost gone ..omg know the one you use during pms...then one time I have pads stuck to my pants..yes picture that walking around with pantyliner infront on my pants darn thing sticky ...then one time I got out of change room trying clothes I come out with my shirt son and husband waiting they stress me...I hurry then come out with backward shirt.

    well so much for the girl who advice me to use old panty during pms now I toss those who cares I use better underwear now..funny..I just laugh it mom use to tell me save new underwear in case I end up in about using new ones...funny! I crack myself up.

  2. Rosette:

    it takes a lot to embarrass me..everybody in this house they say I embarrass them to get even I stuck my underwear inside my husband lunch bag... darn guy check his lunch and pulled out my underwear....!

    oh I was in confrontation with this lady at the bar..I think sometimes I don't realize I embarass people...well the lady sat on this large huge sofa and expecting her friends..I sat at the edge of the sofa....she was telling me her friends are coming so I told her I don't care if he had millions of friends I am not moving ..her problem not mine...funny....

    She annoyed me ...she slowly kind of bounce plop her butt close to me she hinted she was there first but I figured she sat at the middle of the sofa so technically she was invading my space...I told her go back to her space .. I was screaming at her...her tattoed friends embarrassed of her I I bounced plop my butt so hard on the sofa she almost bounced out...funny...I was ready to take her on ..... if my husband was sober he will say I embarass brother the comical guy was saying to me to calm down I was having a fit over a sofa anyway now my brother call me the "BOUNCER" ..... I made the lady move out of the sofa bouncing! Yes funny huh....I tiny person like me I made the lady move.

  3. Rosette:

    my brother he meant me the BOUNCER that kick people out of the club not bouncer that bounce on the sofa.....yes

  4. Rosette:

    oh the most embassing was our frist house got broken all I got for the thief was my old drawer full of old old underwear ..yes my husband worried our house broken all I was thinking damn the thief all he saw my drawer full of old underwear..funny huh!

  5. kuunakanaka:

    aloha Diane:

    after unloading my items onto the conveyor belt i discovered at checkout that i didn't have my wallet or checkbook in my possession because i had left it at the computer after balancing my accounts and shopping online.

  6. Chicken Grease:

    When a Grease used to have GF, in stores, at the mall, etc. (oddly enough, would happen mostly when we were on Mainland trips), he would experience the whole, "what do you think of this?" looking at and showing merchandise who whom a Grease THOUGHT was his GF in the store . . . but, turned out to be someone else entirely. I've heard this happen to others, too. Once, I lifted my head up from the merchandise because my Spidey senses were telling me someone was laughing at my GF and I looking at this item . . . only to see my GF about 10 feet away from me laughing; of course, a Grease immediately earned that cold/hot feeling in tandem with asking myself, "well, just who the heck AM I talking to?"

    As a male, yes, I've had ye olde pants' open zipper about as many times as fellow men have had. And as I get older . . . the occurrences get more numerous. Oi.

    I've had the whole give-the-attendant-the-gift card-and/or-coupon at a store . . . only for that gift card or coupon to be good for another store (happens a lot with Papa Johns and Pizza Hut for I). That kind of thing also happens a lot with my Barnes and Nobles Membership card and my Borders membership card at those respective places, too; not gonna have to worry about that much longer anymore, I suppose.

    I don't watch the TV show, but, I know the concept; when it comes to public restroom, I'm like Monk-like.

    My favorite, though . . . and you folks tell a Grease if you've experienced this phenomenon . . . is embarrassments not committed by a Grease . . . somehow, at the dawn of the smart phone, friends would call and . . . say things that really puzzled me . . . and suggest they have a double-life ('course, can't get into it here, but . . . scandalous-like) 😉 .

  7. Chicken Grease:

    To clarify, re:

    My favorite, though . . . and you folks tell a Grease if you've experienced this phenomenon . . . is embarrassments not committed by a Grease . . . somehow, at the dawn of the smart phone, friends would call and . . . say things that really puzzled me . . . and suggest they have a double-life ('course, can't get into it here, but . . . scandalous-like)

    And somehow the caller ID must've been turned off or they weren't conscious of whom they were calling, see. They thought they were talkin' ta who they intended to call, eek.

  8. Titus:

    I frequently go up to strangers and tell them "hi" because I mistaken them for people that I know. I get blank stares or some of the people say "hi" back. Conversely, when people come up to me and say "hi" and I can't quite place them, I stare at them for awhile, trying desperately to figure out who they are. If I still can't place them, I say, "Hi, great to see you!" and then walk away. Sometimes, they figure out that I don't recognize them and re-introduce themselves, which is the preferable, but embarrassing, way to end my confusion.

  9. M:

    Just another day in the life of Diane Ako. hahaha That's what makes life interesting, you'll never know what to expect.

  10. Rosette:

    Oh one time I got locked out of the house...I shut the door I forgot the key I was with my oldest son he was around five years old using my head I called my husband's work...he work for train... I figure how on earth can I find him I look in the phone book..OMG so many numbers... I look and look...then it says tracking I dialed that "TRACKING" number I told the guy I am tracking my husband ....this guy was laughing so hard.....YES I AM TRACKING MY HUSBAND...the guy still laughing..I DON'T GET IT...funny so the guy said hold on ..he dialed the top guy on the rail road.... still I don't get it...the manager answered so I told him this guy transfered me to you and I am tracking my husband I locked myself out of the house can you help me track him down...funny..when a rail road guy say tracking it means tracking goods...omg ..funny...but I did find my husband..the manager was nice..he was upset at the guy that transfered my husband was so embarassed..well how was I suppose to track you I tolf him...funny..I found you so there I told my husband! I hardly use phone and I dialed the tracking number. I have habit of embarassing everybody and I don't even realize it.

  11. Rosette:

    it take a lot to embarass me..nothing really shock me or really embarass me so I go around cluesless...I be hanging out with my husband and I see a cookie at the counter then I be saying it loud jumping over the counter since I cannot see ..then my son say mom you embarass me..well I cannot see the cookie so high I be jumping..funny..!

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