Archive for September, 2011

Retirees

By
September 19th, 2011



What's that car commercial airing now, in which the young person talks about how his parents need to have more fun, but really, he's the one that needs to have fun? That's my life.

My parents just spent the week on a cruise ship. They'd call me from the shore to say how much fun they were having, with activities, buffet meals, new friends, shows, and shore excursions morning, noon, and night. Up early, to bed late. Too much fun.

I picked them up from the pier, and they did what so many other people do - complain about needing a vacation from their vacation.

My dad talks about having a "ton of work" waiting at home. What that ton is, I'm not sure, as they're retired. I suspect it's cleaning the fish bowls and organizing his computer photo album.

My mom's super big deal is to read all the old newspapers and then cut out the interesting articles to share with friends or file in her archives. Sometimes she cannot visit Olivia because she has to "cut the papers." Our acknowledged shorthand is "Clean my table."

But you know, everyone fits to fill. What you have going on in your life becomes "a lot" no matter what it is.

My friend Paul Drewes' "One to 100" theory neatly sums this philosophy up. His young niece once complained she had "so much work" to do that weekend, to memorize all the numbers from one to 100. At the time he was cramming for college finals. It's all subjective.

At the moment, I really do think I'm legitimately busy, what with a full time job and a little kid. Before and after work, I clean the house, do the chores, and care for Olivia. Somewhere in there I try to find time to exercise, though I often don't. If I am not too tired after all this, I go to jujitsu.

I'm aspiring to be a retiree!

***
Also reach me via DianeAko.com

2011 Vans Triple Crown of Surfing

By
September 16th, 2011



The Vans Triple Crown of Surfing, presented by Rockstar Energy Drink, announced its upcoming winter surf season in Hawaii that will be the final stop of the 2011 Association of Surfing Professionals (ASP) World Tour, crowning this year's men's world surfing champion.

The Series will run from November 12 through December 20, on the North Shore of Oahu, and will offer a total prize purse of $830,000. The Vans Triple Crown of Surfing is the most prestigious surfing series in the world, featuring the top rated surfers in some of the largest waves on the planet.

John John Florence will feature in this year's Vans Triple Crown as part of the newly announced ASP Top 34. Photo: Cestari.

John John Florence will feature in this year's Vans Triple Crown as part of the newly announced ASP Top 34. Photo: Cestari.

Events of the 29th annual Vans Triple Crown of Surfing are:

The Reef Hawaiian Pro, Nov.12-23
Haleiwa Ali'i Beach Park
6-star rated event that offers Prime ratings points
Prize purse: $145,000

The Vans World Cup of Surfing, Nov.24-Dec.6
Sunset Beach
Prime rating & points
Prize purse: $250,000 (upgraded from 2010)

The Billabong Pipe Masters, Dec. 8-20
Banzai Pipeline
World Tour rating & points
Prize purse: $425,000

The Series also offers a $10,000 bonus purse for the Vans Triple Crown champion: The most consistent surfer across all three events.

While there is no women's series this year, Hawaii's newly crowned ASP women's world champion Carissa Moore will be the only woman to line up against the world class field of more than 200 male athletes. Moore, 19, has been granted the ASP Hawaii wildcard into both the Reef Hawaiian Pro and the Vans World Cup.

Despite being one of the youngest competitors in the field, Moore has been competing in the Vans Triple Crown since the tender age of 12 and has registered women's event victories at Haleiwa and Sunset Beach. Her performances in extra large surf at Sunset Beach over the past two years earmarked her as a worthy recipient of the wildcard. The 2011 ASP Women's World Tour culminated in California last month.

"The heritage of the Vans Triple Crown of Surfing is unsurpassed," said event director Randy Rarick. "For close to three decades Hawaii has been the one destination on the ASP World Tour that reliably produces incredible surf and exceptional surfing. When you look through the annals of the Vans Triple Crown, you will find every surfing great and many of the most memorable moments of the sport recorded. The excitement is already building for 2011."

In addition to the surfing events, the SURFER Poll Awards will take place at the Turtle Bay Resort on the evening of December 6, during the Vans Triple Crown period.

The Vans Triple Crown of Surfing is made possible by Vans, Reef, Billabong, Nixon, Skullcandy Supreme Sound, Hawaiian Airlines, Hawaii Tourism, GoPro, Turtle Bay Resort, State Farm, JN Automotive Group, Climb On Products, Clif Bar, Oceanic Time Warner Cable, Road Runner, Flo Water, Surfline.com, SURFING Magazine, and the Association of Surfing Professionals (ASP).

Five

By
September 14th, 2011



My kid's obsessed with five. She keeps asking me if certain things will happen when she turns five- certain earth-shatteringly important things, like:

-Will I be tall enough to ride the water slide when I'm five? (Maybe)

-Are you throwing me a pool party for my birthday when I'm five? (If you want)
-Can you bake me that cake (whatever cake we are looking at at the time) when I'm five? (Yes)

-Will I have boobs like that when I'm five? (Hell no)

That's right. On the last one, she pointed to my chest and asked that. I do not know where she learned that from.

It's so funny that children want to be older, older, older. I remember wanting to be ten so badly because it was two! whole! digits! 10! Wow!

She's so eager for her next birthday, which is nearly a year away, while on the other end of the spectrum, I don't want to acknowledge my birthday. I don't want to be reminded that another year is creeping up on me.

I just had my birthday over the summer and, per usual, my husband asked if I wanted to have a party. I did not. A party takes planning and energy. I don't want to be bothered.

I asked my sitter to give me the gift of time. "Watch Olivia on a Saturday morning so I can spend alone time with Claus during the day," I requested.

The sitter kindly agreed. I rarely hang out alone with Claus during the day. Someone has to watch Olivia and we don't have the sitter on the weekends.

Claus and I swam to Flat Island in Kailua, about a quarter mile swim. I used to swim that all the time when I was childless, and it was fun. Now, it was slow. The round trip took me 40 minutes. Walking around the island took 20 minutes.

What I'm trying to say is that I am no longer in any shape for 60 minutes of moving in the hot sun. It felt great, but I needed a nap that afternoon. After the nap, I felt groggy for the rest of the day.

Claus cooked dinner and gave me a glass of wine. I am watching my diet because I am gaining weight now due to access to fine food + lack of exercise. I rarely drink, so three sips did me in.

Still, I felt compelled to finish the glass, so as to not waste the wine. Think of the grapes that gave their lives for the wine! Honor the brave fruit!

This meant I could barely keep my eyes open for story time at 8 p.m. When the lights went out, I eagerly hit the pillow and stayed down for 11 hours.

This is what Olivia has to look forward to. Enjoy four, I want to tell her.

My earth-shatteringly important question list for my next birthday is:

-Will I want to get into a bathing suit to ride the water slide?

-Will I have the energy to organize another birthday party with two dozen bouncing children?

-Will I still be dieting or can I eat that damned cake?

-Will I have gotten rid of this little gut?

I have a whole year to find out.

***
Also reach me via DianeAko.com

In all fairness

By
September 9th, 2011



(Sorry gang, I have a head cold. I have to skip Monday's blog. I should be in time for Wednesday!)

I met a handsome man recently in a group setting. He was blonde, blue eyed, with what I could tell was a well-kept physique. He looked like an A&F model.

Not to be rude, I went over to introduce myself. We started chatting and he mentioned he was looking for work as a waiter.

"What kind of work experience do you have?" I asked, thinking I might share the job vacancies at my hotels with him.

"Fine dining," he said.

"What kind of fine dining?" I asked.

"Denny's," he answered.

Disbelieving half second stare from me. "Anything else?" I prodded.

"Well, another restaurant, but I can't remember the name. It's really hard to pronounce. It starts with an N," he recalled.

Hmm, maybe not so much.

I later related the story to my friend Julie, who shared many a single-girl episode with me over a decade ago. "Isn't it weird how much things change with age?" I marveled. "I could not go out with a guy that stupid now. Even if he is beautiful."

She agreed. Age does take the fun out of some things.

I shared the story with our friend Darin. Without missing a beat, he said, "You know what that is? Fairness."

I'm pretty quick, but I missed that one. Fairness? I puzzled.

"Yeah. Someone can't be tall, good looking, with a six pack, and a scientist," Darin explained. "This is life being fair. My faith in the karmic balance is restored."

***

Also reach me via DianeAko.com

The maid

By
September 7th, 2011



As I was saying in the previous posting, I've been doing a comprehensive job shadow at work that included me spending time as a housekeeper. It is hard, hard, hard work. It is the hardest job in the hotel. (Please tip your maid next time. In cash.)

I thought I would be equipped for this since I live with two men - one, a bachelor who lives up to the messy stereotype- and a small child, which pretty much positions me as the cleaning-est person in the household. It's not a role I like.

Housekeepers have a set number of rooms to clean, depending on what hotel they work at. They have thin margins of time, so they whip through each room with German precision. They are pretty amazing. If you want a workout, do that for a little while.

I came home a few days in a row with my maid's uniform. Often, I come home and start cleaning something else.

I was at my kitchen sink when my mom walked in and started laughing at me. "You always say you feel like the maid in your house," she chuckled. "Did you make the full transition?"

"Very funny, Mom," I said, without stopping what I was doing.

"Sorry. That was bad," she apologized. "Oh, and I won't need a turn down tonight. Thanks though."

***
Also reach me via DianeAko.com

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