Trading up
By Diane Ako
I have been researching Cotournix quails and would like to get a pair. I'm not totally sure I have the energy for them, but they're so dang cute, and I do love animals.
I was mentioning this to my friend Paul, telling him how Claus has been on a 'yes' streak with me lately. (See: The Treatment)
In previous conversations, Paul and I have discussed Claus' obstinance on having a second child. He is a firm no and totally not moveable on this. I tried for years and gave up. He gives in to me 99% of the time but on the 1% of the time when he's made up his mind, he is set.
"Goats, birds, shrimp, bunnies, guinea pigs - I'm telling you, you have to think of it like Fun Factory," he said. "You get all the little prizes, then save that up and trade it in for a bigger prize. Tell him you're exchanging all the farm animals for a baby."
=
???
Um. I'll let you know if that strategy works.
Small Talk
August 10th, 2012 at 5:46 am
Having at least 2 children really is a good idea. Not for your sake, but for the kids' sake.
Tell Claus that.
August 10th, 2012 at 6:59 am
Hello Diane,
I have a daughter and son and it worked out perfect.
August 10th, 2012 at 7:25 am
I sympathize with both Diane and Claus. Both will lose in this struggle over whether to make another baby. Lots of stress whichever way it goes.
Premenopausal woman sees the sands going through the hourglass and wants to hang on to youth as measured by fecundity. Pleads with husband who says no. If "no" prevails, he will always wonder whether she might always harbor resentment (even if she doesn't) along with the emptiness of missing the baby who never was. If "yes" prevails she will always worry that husband resents her for making him give in (even if he doesn't harbor resentment).
Husband looks forward to renewed closeness with wife as child heading off to school is no longer so dependent, no longer sucking up all the energy in the home. If he says no more babies, he knows wife might resent him forever (even if she doesn't) and the magical spark between them might be extinguished. If he gives in, he knows it will be 5-10 more years of playing second (now third) fiddle, wife sleeping with baby instead of with him. The drone, having done his duty of fertilizing the queen, is now at the bottom of the hive's totem pole.
Such a difficult dilemma. Having no family is sometimes lonely for me. But this is one of those times when I am so very glad not to be burdened with such complexity and kaumaha. Freedom! Best wishes to Diane and Claus (and Olivia) as they struggle through this decision and its longterm consequences.
August 10th, 2012 at 8:00 am
There isn't too much drama behind this. We've had polite discussions and I am OK with one or two. Blog is for humor- as are most things I talk about!
August 10th, 2012 at 12:44 pm
I quail to ask ... but where and how would one get these quail? What do they eat? Will they try to escape if you keep them outside? Etc.
If you don't pursue having quail, you might consider a hen. They can get pretty domesticated if you start with a juvenile, and since the hen is an outdoor-only pet it can coexist with other creatures. Olivia would probably enjoy figuring out the hen's laying/brooding spots. Our kids enjoyed having a hen.
August 10th, 2012 at 2:42 pm
Quail? Quail? Wow, I didn't even know those things were legal there. I thought it would be the stereotypical mynahs, doves, sparrows, and pigeons. In my neighborhood, there's a farm and ranch store just down the road from here that sells all kinds of chicks. I never knew there were so many different breeds of chickens and other birds, it's crazy.
August 10th, 2012 at 8:02 pm
yes maybe it would be a lot of work having birds...
DOVES comes to visit me in the morning ..I love to watch them every morning they fly around on top of our house...lucky I don't have to care for them but I am grateful they come visit me ...so peaceful I watch them while I have breakfast.
Well I have two boys and you will never know if the second child would be sickly etc etc..MY HUSBAND WoRRIED TO DEATH.....my husbnad he doesn't want kids well HUH TWO TOUGH ...funny! BUT HE LOVES HIS BOYS...yes after two kids you think it over .....the nieghbor used to tell me try for a girl but I figured my kids will have kids and if they get married thier wife will be like my kid too..I should have LISTENED TO MY HUSBAND moron was right..funny...omg....well LOVE MY KIDS sometimes you think it over..ha ha ha good thing I am halfway done raising them. ....
August 10th, 2012 at 8:06 pm
I had seven years span between my two boys..... so each of my child was an only child in a sense......I enjoyed each of my boys...... TWO is good ....I was younger when I had them had more energy and patience...but third time now would be suicide.......HELL..HELL ... BIRDS WOUDL BE A LOT EASIER ...fly fly away bird..you cannot just shoooo kids away...omg!
August 10th, 2012 at 8:09 pm
with two kids they have each other.... when I had my first son he was content child he wasn't looking for playmates ....he was happy playing alone..... some kids they prefer being the only child.....they eventually get married and they no longer need thier sibling.