Small Talk

Fish eyes

October 4th, 2016

This headline is dedicated to my friend Glenn, who loves to use the term "fish eyes" to describe the blank stare of non-comprehension (intentional or not).


I get very, very excited to plan parties and events for Olivia. I really get off on thinking about the menu, the guest list, the favors, the activities, etc.

I delight in envisioning her excitement, and enjoy having conversations with her to further plan. She's so much fun. I love to make her happy.

Olivia is hosting a big slumber party coming up with six girlfriends. It's her biggest sleepover ever. We've accidentally had two neighbor girls over once, but historically, the standard is one friend.

This isn't even for any special occasion. It's just that I'm eager to jump back into Mommy Life in all forms, which I largely ignored or did the bare minimum for when I was recently working and very tired.

I'd like to send the girls home with a little favor, so I got cylinder vases and planned to layer colorful candies to create an artful effect. In the store, I asked Claus to help me decide which candies are best.

I love chocolate, but I wanted unwrapped candy if possible because that's prettier. "Candy corn! That's perfect!" I uttered, but as I reached for a bag, I realized there's four different types - candy corn, autumn corn, pumpkins, and mixed fall designs.

"Which one looks best?" I agonized, while Husband stood mutely next to me. I really would like an answer.

"This or this?" I asked.

"Yes," he said.

"No, really! This or this? I think Mixed is good, but then maybe Autumn Corn looks nicer with the fall-themed M & M's?" I persisted. This is really important stuff.

"This is great," he said, and, I suspect, reached for the bag closer to him. I accused him of disinterest.

"I really wish you'd be more into this," I complained.

"I'm totally into this," he assured me unconvincingly with his Fish Eyes.


It was pretty much like this for every candy decision until I gave up, which was, I'm sure, his desired effect. *sigh*

Later that day, he came home from a visit with his stockbroker. "How was your meeting?" I inquired politely. I hate finance and I don't really care what the answer is past "Good" or "Junk."

We both know this, and have both known this for years, yet he went ahead anyway with telling me about it. "Funds... equities... pricing levels... speculation... pullback... interest rates... portfolio... stocks and bonds... market fluctuation."

He concluded with a question for me that I didn't even hear, but nodded yes in the hopes that was the right answer and that I wasn't making anybody mad. He probably asked me if he could blow all our savings on buying an airplane and I just approved it.


Anyway, he didn't get mad. But he did know I wasn't really listening. "Fish Eyes, right back at you," I laughed.

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